While perusing the United Press International web site for some of my daily news I noticed something curious. Governor Robert McDonell of Virginia has decided to declare April Confederate history month. He claimed it was to "bolster tourism" and to "make many aware of the sacrifices of soldiers and leaders of the confederacy."
From 1861 to 1865 The United State of America was divided into two separate nations. One calling itself the United States of America, the other the Confederate states of America. Many Americans like to think that the war was effectively about slavery when in fact the war had been raging for an entire year before U.S. President Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation which in THERORY freed slaves in the Confederate States. Effectively the Emancipation Proclamation said to the south 'If we're victorious...we're freeing your slaves.'
The causes of the American civil war had nothing to do with Americans in the north caring about the freedom of Slaves, but rather had more to do with economics and politics which have been the root of every war. The south's agrarian economy relied on slave labor to cultivate and harvest, tobacco, sugar and cotton just as the north's economy counted on a steady stream of immigrants from Ireland, southern and eastern Europe who were willing to work for pennies a day. The issue was not free men versus slaves but rather the congressional representation that the Southern states received from 3/5th of each state's non voting slave population.
Southern Agrarians could easily capture a majority in congress by simply purchasing or breeding more slaves. Northern industrialist who opposed slavery did so because slavery offered their Southern agrarian competitors a political advantage and not because of of some romanticized love of freedom as many revisionist historians would have us believe. Abraham Lincoln himself once said during the famed Lincoln/Douglas Debates "If I can preserve the union by freeing all the slaves, I shall do that. I can preserve the union without freeing a single slave I shall to that."
Rich men on both sides of the Mason Dixon line convinced the poor men who would fight the war of some sense of duty. Northern Industrialist talked of "Freedom" Southern Agrarians talked of a large central government interfering with "popular sovereignty". But the end result was the bloodiest conflict to take place on American soil with 620,000 Americans dying in the end.
When the smoke cleared America mended it's fences as best it could but there were resentments that simply wouldn't die. Were you to talk to the descendant of a Union Soldier he/she would talk of how his/her ancestor fought to preserve the Union. Were you to talk to the descendant of a Confederate soldier you would hear of the courage of his/her ancestor in fighting a tyrannical government bent on imposing it's will upon an angry populace. Were you to talk to the descendant of a slave they would either consider the Union heroes and the Confederacy racist, or simply view it as yet another war between men who simply saw their ancestors as chattel.
Whatever one's point of view it has to be said rather someone is a hero or villain is determined largely by geography and ideology. Should Virginians celebrate the "glorious Confederacy?" It could be said that those who wish to should be allowed to but to be true to the spirit of the Confederacy those who choose not to...should not have it "forced upon them by a tyrannical government."
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Open Letter to the Tea Party:
Ladies and Gentlemen:
America was founded by men (mostly wealthy merchants and planters.) who protested their taxes being raised to pay for a war which defended them from the French. Being a dissident as part of being an American and the right to dissent is written into our constitution. While it is frequently not fair that those who dissent are often labeled as "rabble rousers" and more often than not "un-american" we should realize that our republic would not exist if everyone who disagreed with George III had simply kept quiet.
The irony attached to your party would have to be that many of you openly questioned the patriotism of your fellow Americans who protested the war in Iraq or President George W. Bush. Many of your older members considered the entire civil rights movement a Communist plot and were quite adament in stating your opposition to it.
As a young Marine I would have died for your right to disagree with me and as a fellow citizen I would still agree that you've the right to disagree with me and I with you. Ladies and gents you've fought the good fight, but now is the time to lay down your arms and come to terms with the fact that this battle is over. The court challenges will be to no avail but those of us who opposed you expect a battery of them and shall endure them all the way you endured our endless challenges of the election of 2000.
When the dust clears and the anger, bitterness and disappointment subside as ours did in 2000 you'll realize that in the great tradition of American politics you were an integral player and are part of a dance that shall exist as long as our democracy endures.
Despite his surname Barack Hussein Obama is not a practicing Muslim. He is not intent on destroying our great nation and he is not the "anti-christ" which the book of Revelation spoke of. He is merely another American whose political ideology is juxtaposed to your own and earnestly if we all shared the same ideology our republic would have become stagnant and ceased to exist long ago.
All things considered. Those of you who protested health insurance providers being able to charge you ridiculous premiums, raise your premiums & deductables or cancel your policy on a whim without reprocussions that was your right as Americans. Just as it was your right to protest any attempt at policing a self regulating industry who essentailly could tell Americans to go off and die simply because they were too great a health risk to warrant coverage, it is my right to teach you a mantra I found myself reciting in 2000 and again in 2004.
"MycandidatelosttheelectionI'mgoingtohavetogetoverit....mycandidatelosttheelectionI'mgoingtohave togetoverit." Say it until you're calm and the next 3 to 7 years may pass a bit more quickly.
America was founded by men (mostly wealthy merchants and planters.) who protested their taxes being raised to pay for a war which defended them from the French. Being a dissident as part of being an American and the right to dissent is written into our constitution. While it is frequently not fair that those who dissent are often labeled as "rabble rousers" and more often than not "un-american" we should realize that our republic would not exist if everyone who disagreed with George III had simply kept quiet.
The irony attached to your party would have to be that many of you openly questioned the patriotism of your fellow Americans who protested the war in Iraq or President George W. Bush. Many of your older members considered the entire civil rights movement a Communist plot and were quite adament in stating your opposition to it.
As a young Marine I would have died for your right to disagree with me and as a fellow citizen I would still agree that you've the right to disagree with me and I with you. Ladies and gents you've fought the good fight, but now is the time to lay down your arms and come to terms with the fact that this battle is over. The court challenges will be to no avail but those of us who opposed you expect a battery of them and shall endure them all the way you endured our endless challenges of the election of 2000.
When the dust clears and the anger, bitterness and disappointment subside as ours did in 2000 you'll realize that in the great tradition of American politics you were an integral player and are part of a dance that shall exist as long as our democracy endures.
Despite his surname Barack Hussein Obama is not a practicing Muslim. He is not intent on destroying our great nation and he is not the "anti-christ" which the book of Revelation spoke of. He is merely another American whose political ideology is juxtaposed to your own and earnestly if we all shared the same ideology our republic would have become stagnant and ceased to exist long ago.
All things considered. Those of you who protested health insurance providers being able to charge you ridiculous premiums, raise your premiums & deductables or cancel your policy on a whim without reprocussions that was your right as Americans. Just as it was your right to protest any attempt at policing a self regulating industry who essentailly could tell Americans to go off and die simply because they were too great a health risk to warrant coverage, it is my right to teach you a mantra I found myself reciting in 2000 and again in 2004.
"MycandidatelosttheelectionI'mgoingtohavetogetoverit....mycandidatelosttheelectionI'mgoingtohave togetoverit." Say it until you're calm and the next 3 to 7 years may pass a bit more quickly.
Obama-care!? The Sky is Falling!
Teddy Roosevelt once invisioned a nation where all Americans would have access to affordable healthcare. It did not come to pass and the creation of the FDA didn't make him any friends in the meat packing industry.
Roosevelt's nephew Franklin was elected president during the great depression and suggested healthcare for all Americans, but it was lost in the shuffle of the various new deal programs he proposed, many of which were called "unconstituional" by his opponents.
Harry Truman proposed healthcare, but with the tail end of the second world war, the beginnings of the cold war and various other issues put it on the back burner. Joseph McCarthy was quick to brand anyone and anything he didn't like as communist so the idea of the government getting involved in any aspect of American life was as unpopular as those on McCarthy's blacklist.
John Kennedy talked about universal health care when he was a candidate but didn't introduce any legislation to back it up. After Kennedy's assasination, Lyndon Johnson proposed health care and was shot down but introduced medicare..
Richard Milhaus Nixon was the LONE Republican voice who spoke up for universal healthcare and was shot down by his own party. It was not until Bill Clinton that healthcare came back to the forefront where it was slowly beaten down by a strong Republican party.
After a century an American President has done what many thought impossible. Gathered enough men and women in congress who were willing to put their political careers on the line and pass a piece of legislation that would give greater access to healthcare to American men and women.
Rather or not one agrees with the new healthcare laws, we have to sit back for a minute and think about how monumental a piece of legislation this is. Is it "socialized medicine" No. It places caps on rate hikes that insurance companies can give the insured. It tells insurance companies that they can no longer cancel your policy because you simply made a claim. Insurance exist to pay your bills in the event that you get sick...the fact that they were free to cancel your policy when you chose to use them never made any sense. No Americans will be forced to give up the health coverage they already enjoy if they have it. The new healthcare law also gives tax credits to small businesses to insure their employees and enables peopel to keep thier children on their insurance until 26.
Any of these things sound like bad ideas thusfar? Not to me, but many in GOP see it as Socialized medicine. Far from it. This legislation will not create a slew of "government" hospitals. It will however prove beneicial to insurance companies as it will give them millions of new customers. The new healthcare bill is simply insurance industry legislation and the industry simply didn't wish to be regulated.
Martin Luther King once said that "Men with power do not wish to relinquish it easily." A Belgian Nobel Lauriat once said "There are invariably 10,000 men in the path of change." To that end change is inevidible. Should we therefore embrace change? No, change isn't always a good thing, but we should always be open to and experience it before we decide how much we do or don't care for it.
For the most part however many Americans will not notice any sweeping changes in healthcare unless they find themselves hospitalized. We as a republic shall neither implode nor collapse. The sky will not fall upon our heads and tanks emblazoned with the hammer an siclkle shall not roll with our streets escorting troops who will then hand each citizen a set of olive drab Mao Tse Tung style fatigues.
America is not perfect as much as we would hope for it to be, but we as a nation get closer to it every day. Will there be abuses in the system? There are abuses in the CURRENT system and in EVERY system, to suggest otherwise would be laughable. Will America be better off because of the legislation that President Obama signs into law today? The passage of time is the best measure.
Roosevelt's nephew Franklin was elected president during the great depression and suggested healthcare for all Americans, but it was lost in the shuffle of the various new deal programs he proposed, many of which were called "unconstituional" by his opponents.
Harry Truman proposed healthcare, but with the tail end of the second world war, the beginnings of the cold war and various other issues put it on the back burner. Joseph McCarthy was quick to brand anyone and anything he didn't like as communist so the idea of the government getting involved in any aspect of American life was as unpopular as those on McCarthy's blacklist.
John Kennedy talked about universal health care when he was a candidate but didn't introduce any legislation to back it up. After Kennedy's assasination, Lyndon Johnson proposed health care and was shot down but introduced medicare..
Richard Milhaus Nixon was the LONE Republican voice who spoke up for universal healthcare and was shot down by his own party. It was not until Bill Clinton that healthcare came back to the forefront where it was slowly beaten down by a strong Republican party.
After a century an American President has done what many thought impossible. Gathered enough men and women in congress who were willing to put their political careers on the line and pass a piece of legislation that would give greater access to healthcare to American men and women.
Rather or not one agrees with the new healthcare laws, we have to sit back for a minute and think about how monumental a piece of legislation this is. Is it "socialized medicine" No. It places caps on rate hikes that insurance companies can give the insured. It tells insurance companies that they can no longer cancel your policy because you simply made a claim. Insurance exist to pay your bills in the event that you get sick...the fact that they were free to cancel your policy when you chose to use them never made any sense. No Americans will be forced to give up the health coverage they already enjoy if they have it. The new healthcare law also gives tax credits to small businesses to insure their employees and enables peopel to keep thier children on their insurance until 26.
Any of these things sound like bad ideas thusfar? Not to me, but many in GOP see it as Socialized medicine. Far from it. This legislation will not create a slew of "government" hospitals. It will however prove beneicial to insurance companies as it will give them millions of new customers. The new healthcare bill is simply insurance industry legislation and the industry simply didn't wish to be regulated.
Martin Luther King once said that "Men with power do not wish to relinquish it easily." A Belgian Nobel Lauriat once said "There are invariably 10,000 men in the path of change." To that end change is inevidible. Should we therefore embrace change? No, change isn't always a good thing, but we should always be open to and experience it before we decide how much we do or don't care for it.
For the most part however many Americans will not notice any sweeping changes in healthcare unless they find themselves hospitalized. We as a republic shall neither implode nor collapse. The sky will not fall upon our heads and tanks emblazoned with the hammer an siclkle shall not roll with our streets escorting troops who will then hand each citizen a set of olive drab Mao Tse Tung style fatigues.
America is not perfect as much as we would hope for it to be, but we as a nation get closer to it every day. Will there be abuses in the system? There are abuses in the CURRENT system and in EVERY system, to suggest otherwise would be laughable. Will America be better off because of the legislation that President Obama signs into law today? The passage of time is the best measure.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Stay Black and Proud...except for you.
Don't ask me why, but for some reason I was convinced to attend a meeting of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People. I'd avoided the NAACP because of a run in with an NAACP official several years ago at one of their conventions. He was a person of note and I attempted to shake his hand at which point he looked at me as if I were begging him for change. I noticed him posing for photos with various people at the event at which I met him and when I attempted to get a photo with him I was treated as if I'd just crawled from a septic tank. I left feeling insulted and the following day I saw the same man who had rebuffed me nearly in tears because members of MY generation weren't joining the NAACP in the numbers we once were during the 50's, 60's and 70's. I wanted to reach into my television pull the negro through it and beat him until his mother didn't recognize him for this hypocrisy.
Regardless, I was attending an NAACP meeting. The turn out was small and the bulk of the membership were men and women in their late 50s and early 60s. There were a handful of people my age, but not many. The new people were asked to give their names and say somethin about themselves and when my turn came I said who I was and said what I do during the day to pay the bills. I thought nothing of it, but when the meeting concluded I found myself being told that the NAACP's national convention would be in our city and that I of all people should come up with an idea for a business that I could shop around to some of the well connected persons who might show up.
Another older member told me that I would "find my nitch" at some point. Mind you my day job doesn't have a pension or benefits, but it's nice to know that members of my parents generation could easily overlook the fact that I:
a. Wasn't in jail
b. wasn't breaking the LAW to support myself.
c. HAD A JOB!
yet they were wondering why I and other members of my generation weren't rushing out in DROVES to join them. In the parking lot one of the older members whom initially thought was okay took issue with the fact that one of the chapter's officers was white. He went on some drawn out racist tirade about how black organizations don't need white members etc and peppered his sentiments with a plethora of racial slurs.
He then got on me when he learned that one of my closest friends is Asian by saying how my generation has so alienated itself that we have to look to "other races" because we can't befriend one another.
I know the people I met are not the ENTIRE NAACP, but at the same time I was thinking that this cross sampling reminded me why I hadn't joined the organization in the first place. I'm not saying they don't do any good. The organization was at the forefront of the civil rights movement and many of the rights I take for granted today were secured by NAACP lawyers like Thurgood Marshall, but today's NAACP needs to find leadership that looks at today's issues rather than celebrating it's glorious past and try to appeal to men and women whose generational outlook is more in keeping with the new millineum and the problems that we (Americans of every race) will have to solve.
Regardless, I was attending an NAACP meeting. The turn out was small and the bulk of the membership were men and women in their late 50s and early 60s. There were a handful of people my age, but not many. The new people were asked to give their names and say somethin about themselves and when my turn came I said who I was and said what I do during the day to pay the bills. I thought nothing of it, but when the meeting concluded I found myself being told that the NAACP's national convention would be in our city and that I of all people should come up with an idea for a business that I could shop around to some of the well connected persons who might show up.
Another older member told me that I would "find my nitch" at some point. Mind you my day job doesn't have a pension or benefits, but it's nice to know that members of my parents generation could easily overlook the fact that I:
a. Wasn't in jail
b. wasn't breaking the LAW to support myself.
c. HAD A JOB!
yet they were wondering why I and other members of my generation weren't rushing out in DROVES to join them. In the parking lot one of the older members whom initially thought was okay took issue with the fact that one of the chapter's officers was white. He went on some drawn out racist tirade about how black organizations don't need white members etc and peppered his sentiments with a plethora of racial slurs.
He then got on me when he learned that one of my closest friends is Asian by saying how my generation has so alienated itself that we have to look to "other races" because we can't befriend one another.
I know the people I met are not the ENTIRE NAACP, but at the same time I was thinking that this cross sampling reminded me why I hadn't joined the organization in the first place. I'm not saying they don't do any good. The organization was at the forefront of the civil rights movement and many of the rights I take for granted today were secured by NAACP lawyers like Thurgood Marshall, but today's NAACP needs to find leadership that looks at today's issues rather than celebrating it's glorious past and try to appeal to men and women whose generational outlook is more in keeping with the new millineum and the problems that we (Americans of every race) will have to solve.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Legacy of the Little Boy
A fair amount of time had elapsed from 8:15am August 6 1945 to a cold, late December afternoon in 2009 when a 40 year old, dredlocked, American former Marine got off a trolley in Hiroshima clad in an old field jacket. Armed with a digital camera, his mission was to capture a piece of history.
When one stands before the "peace dome" one can't help but think that mere yards away the bomb produced by the Manhattan project which was jokingly named "little boy" was dropped by the Enola Gay and detonated 600 meters above and changed not only the city of Hiroshima, but the entire world.
Co-pilot Captain Robert A. Lewis wrote in the Enola Gay's log after seeing the mushroom cloud "My God...what have we done."
The Peace Dome was one of the handful of buildings which survived when Hiroshima and the bulk of her inhabitants evaporated on that hot August morning. As a hard wind whipped your humble narrator's locks from the back of his head to his face he stood there attempting to take a photo of the building around which the present day city of Hiroshima seemed to have been rebuilt.
I stood there as my cold fingers fumbled with the buttons on my camera attempting to photograph a building which had been seen by the entire world in the 69 years since the bombing. Tears streamed down my face as I took photo after photo and thought of the men, women and children who never knew the bomb was coming and died instantly.
I thought about those who survived only to die shortly afterwards and those who survived and suffered from radiation related illnesses for the remainder of their lives.
As I ventured through the park and to the peace museum itself I saw a disclaimer from the Japanese government which said essentially that the purpose of the museum was not to place blame on the United States and how Japan's Emperial policies and it's attack on the United States meant that they could not claim to be innocent victims. The purpose of the musem was simply to show the world the consequences of war and how the losers always out number the winners.
I thought of the American, British & Australian soldiers, sailors and Marines who died at places like Iwo Jima, Tarawa, Battan and Wake Island. I thought of the Chinese butchered at Nanking, the Korean & Chinese "Comfort women" forced into prostitution to service the Japanese military and the countless Japanese civilians who died in American bombings.
Wars are started by old men, fought by young ones, but suffered by entire populations. The U.S. Department of Defense estimates that a million American servicemen would have lost their lives in an attempt to invade Japan and no one is quite sure how many Japanese civilians and military would have been lost.
The bomb had been called a "nessasary evil" but as one stands in the shadow of the peace dome, one can't help but wonder HAVE we learned anything from the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki? The bombs in the world's nuclear arsenals destroy 10,000 times more "efficiently" than little boy and fat man did. We are just as likely now to engage in armed conflict as we EVER were and truthfully there are many who can't see beyond nationalistic furor which blinds them from seeing the citizens of a country which his own has declared "the enemy" as human.
At the end of the day as I stared out the window of an okonomiyaki restaurant on the other side of a narrow street from the peace dome, all of this ran through my tired mind. How many "peace domes" will the world know 69 years hence?
When one stands before the "peace dome" one can't help but think that mere yards away the bomb produced by the Manhattan project which was jokingly named "little boy" was dropped by the Enola Gay and detonated 600 meters above and changed not only the city of Hiroshima, but the entire world.
Co-pilot Captain Robert A. Lewis wrote in the Enola Gay's log after seeing the mushroom cloud "My God...what have we done."
The Peace Dome was one of the handful of buildings which survived when Hiroshima and the bulk of her inhabitants evaporated on that hot August morning. As a hard wind whipped your humble narrator's locks from the back of his head to his face he stood there attempting to take a photo of the building around which the present day city of Hiroshima seemed to have been rebuilt.
I stood there as my cold fingers fumbled with the buttons on my camera attempting to photograph a building which had been seen by the entire world in the 69 years since the bombing. Tears streamed down my face as I took photo after photo and thought of the men, women and children who never knew the bomb was coming and died instantly.
I thought about those who survived only to die shortly afterwards and those who survived and suffered from radiation related illnesses for the remainder of their lives.
As I ventured through the park and to the peace museum itself I saw a disclaimer from the Japanese government which said essentially that the purpose of the museum was not to place blame on the United States and how Japan's Emperial policies and it's attack on the United States meant that they could not claim to be innocent victims. The purpose of the musem was simply to show the world the consequences of war and how the losers always out number the winners.
I thought of the American, British & Australian soldiers, sailors and Marines who died at places like Iwo Jima, Tarawa, Battan and Wake Island. I thought of the Chinese butchered at Nanking, the Korean & Chinese "Comfort women" forced into prostitution to service the Japanese military and the countless Japanese civilians who died in American bombings.
Wars are started by old men, fought by young ones, but suffered by entire populations. The U.S. Department of Defense estimates that a million American servicemen would have lost their lives in an attempt to invade Japan and no one is quite sure how many Japanese civilians and military would have been lost.
The bomb had been called a "nessasary evil" but as one stands in the shadow of the peace dome, one can't help but wonder HAVE we learned anything from the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki? The bombs in the world's nuclear arsenals destroy 10,000 times more "efficiently" than little boy and fat man did. We are just as likely now to engage in armed conflict as we EVER were and truthfully there are many who can't see beyond nationalistic furor which blinds them from seeing the citizens of a country which his own has declared "the enemy" as human.
At the end of the day as I stared out the window of an okonomiyaki restaurant on the other side of a narrow street from the peace dome, all of this ran through my tired mind. How many "peace domes" will the world know 69 years hence?
Monday, December 14, 2009
Houston's New Mayor.
Annise Parker has been actively involved in Houston politics for as long as I can remember. She has been a city counsel member in both a district and at large and has been city controller. Several years ago, I was fortunate enough to meet Ms. Parker and she struck me as a sincere public servant.
Ms. Parker ran for mayor against a Gene Locke whose political "experience" came as an appointee to several positions. He wasn't a bad man and wouldn't have been a bad mayor, but many felt Ms. Parker to have been more qualified and she won 52% of the vote in Houston's mayoral election. I will say I like Ms. Parker and voted for her.
All is well in Houston...except there are one or two people who take issue with the fact that Ms. Parker is openly gay. My voting for Ms. Parker had nothing to do with her sexuality. She strikes me as a competent public servant who has the best interest of the city at heart and to that end I think she'll make a great mayor. My concern as I cast my ballot as well as now is those who will spend the next two years talking about the fact that my new mayor is a lesbian.
The national media will take both sides of the coin. Conservative media outlets will blast Houston as the new Soddom because we've elected a homosexual as mayor, the "progressive" media outlets will try to treat Houston as a 'city on a hill' in the struggle for gay rights. I wish for us to be seen as neither. There will be religious types who will more than likely not consider us as a choice for their church's conventions.
Ms. Parker ran for mayor against a Gene Locke whose political "experience" came as an appointee to several positions. He wasn't a bad man and wouldn't have been a bad mayor, but many felt Ms. Parker to have been more qualified and she won 52% of the vote in Houston's mayoral election. I will say I like Ms. Parker and voted for her.
All is well in Houston...except there are one or two people who take issue with the fact that Ms. Parker is openly gay. My voting for Ms. Parker had nothing to do with her sexuality. She strikes me as a competent public servant who has the best interest of the city at heart and to that end I think she'll make a great mayor. My concern as I cast my ballot as well as now is those who will spend the next two years talking about the fact that my new mayor is a lesbian.
The national media will take both sides of the coin. Conservative media outlets will blast Houston as the new Soddom because we've elected a homosexual as mayor, the "progressive" media outlets will try to treat Houston as a 'city on a hill' in the struggle for gay rights. I wish for us to be seen as neither. There will be religious types who will more than likely not consider us as a choice for their church's conventions.
There will be gun lobbies who will wonder how the biggest city in Texas could have done such a thing and will either avoid us or make it their mission to show us the "error" of our ways. We ARE the 4th largest city in America with an oil and gas industry that keeps a good portion of America afloat.
We're the busiest port on the gulf coast and a city where the cost of living doesn't eat the average person alive. Mayor Parker grew up here and is an intelligent woman with a good head on her shoulders and will have a large, diverse city to run. She needs "The Advocate" in her face as badly as she needs "Fox News." I for one hope both leave us and our mayor alone.
We're the busiest port on the gulf coast and a city where the cost of living doesn't eat the average person alive. Mayor Parker grew up here and is an intelligent woman with a good head on her shoulders and will have a large, diverse city to run. She needs "The Advocate" in her face as badly as she needs "Fox News." I for one hope both leave us and our mayor alone.
Monday, November 2, 2009
I...Hate Everything about....(list #1)
In the 90's Rock group Ugly Kid Joe did a tune called "Everything About You" in which the singer outlined everything he hated about his girlfriend. I'm not here to bitch about a lady, but rather about little things in every day life that irritate the hell out of me.
Hand Sanitizer: For God's sake. I'm IN a bathroom. I want a big, soapy anti bacterial lather. This crap is just some gooey alcohol that kills germs...but leaves dirt in place. I had axel grease on my hands. The hand sanitizer killed every last germ in it! I can't touch ANYTHING....but if I did the huge black stains I left would be hypoallergenic!
BlueTooth Headsets: Ever see a guy walking down the street talking to himself? If you saw this before 2005 it was some mentally disturbed individual discussing the subtle differences between 18th century British Parlaimentary procedures and the current model used in India or Why Pitt the Elder was a MUCH better Prime Minister than Benjamin Deshrali. NOW if you see the same guy and he has a little piece of blue plastic on his ear...you can rest assured that some bozo OTHER than you is listening to this prattling dufus.
Fox News: I could care less that they used press releases from the Bush Whitehouse as news stories. It doesn't bother me that they trash President Obama. They make the hate list because of the whole "tea bag" fiasco. People, you're entitled to slant to the right. The world would suck if we all agreed, but you can't argue that you're fair and balanced and that you're merely reporting news if you SPONSORED the "tea parties" and set up "tea party" web sites. Ladies and gents despite how un-abashedly pro Obama MSNBC is...durring the presidential campaigns they didn't set up Obama web sites. For the record I don't hate YOU guys. It's the hypocricy I hate.
The BCIS Ratings: So I have to watch USC, UT and Notre Dame in Bowl games every season even if they post sucky records because by VIRTUE of the fact that they are USC, UT and Notre Dame...they're going to AUTOMATICALLY make it to bowl games? There are colleges and universities with winning teams who we'll never see playing in a bowl game, because YOU jackasses don't know of any famous alumni from the schools in question. You guys should change if from the BCIS to the BSCIS. It would be more fitting. Hey guys ever hear of PLAYOFFS? They do it for college basketball...no one's complained yet.
Kid's Breakfast Cereal: Not because they're loaded with sugar. Not because they have no nutritional value, not because they're possibly the worst things any human can possibly consume...but because they don't put PRIZES in the boxes anymore! WTF people. A brotha can't get a decoder ring in a box of Cocoa Pebbles? Captain Crunch out of 3D glasses? You people sicken me!
People who talk on the PHONE or Text while driving: Okay. We as a society live under the DELUSION that there is such a thing as "multi-tasking" Translation a bunch of cheap A-holes who run companies rather than letting individuals be productive by doing one thing at a time give one person the work of three people. This idiocy crept it's way into real life to the point where people will attempt to manuver a couple of thousand pounds of steel and fiberglass through groups of people doing the same while:
a. applying make up
b. eating
c. playing air guitar
d. text messaging
e. receiving "oral pleasure" (as outlined in the film "Pulp Fiction")
f. watching small video screens
g. reading books/ news papers
h. combing their hair
i. TALKING ON THE PHONE!
People try something novel...like...um...I don't know....DRIVING YOUR *FCUK(tm.)ing car!
*FCUK = French Connection United Kingdom a clothing manufacturer...I had no idea they made cars.
The Techno remix of ANYTHING!!!: I liked the song. I liked the first remix...do you have to do 20 remixes of a given song or worse still give it the same sickening euro-trash (in 2/4 time dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum...dum-dum-dum-dum-dum) back beat? Just shoot me in the forehead, it would be much more humane than hearing the mega-mix of Elmo singing the alphabet.
The Dallas Cowboys: They didn't do anything in particular this time around, but I've always hated the organization for various reason and I just didn't want to leave them out.
Basketball referees: The officials are the reason I don't watch basketball anymore. No one calls traveling EVER! "Marquis" players don't get called for ANYTHING. Michael Jordan was a gifted athlete...he didn't NEED referees ignoring the FLAGRANT fouls he committed...but they did anyway. If you doubt that refs can control the outcome of a basketball game...ask the Sacremento Kings how four of their starting FIVE fouled out in a playoff game against the Lakers.
Activist with 'mysterious' sources of income: Ever see someone on TV with the caption "community activist" under their name? I'll bet it's someone who has a camera in his/her face whenever there is an issue with some disenfranchised group. After the rally or press conference ends, this person usually hops into a new Mercedes or a Range Rover and drives off to a big house..rather than some kind of job. I'm all for helping out one's community...but if it seems like it's all you do you kinda look like a parasite. Martin Luther King was a minister, Caesar Chavez was a Union Organizer. My point? Both of these cats had jobs. Look into it...
The Hills/Keeping up With the Kadashians/Jon & Kate/ Kathy Griffin/ & Every"SCRIPTED reality show: I only know who Heidi and Spencer are...because TMZ puts a camera in their faces every 8 seconds and TELLS ME their famous, prior to that I neither knew, cared nor gave a vugg. Insofar as I can figure out she's an idiot and he's a douche incapable of growing visible facial hair. Kim Kardashian is pretty enough, but had she not video taped herself getting her freak on with Brandi's barely talented younger brother (who would have had neither a recording/acting career without her) would anyone have any clue who she was? You're a pretty Armenian girl with a big butt...so what. That and $5.00 will get you a coffee at Starbucks. If you don't have any actual talent you shouldn't be famous simply for BEING famous. The exceptions are Kathy Griffin and Maragret Cho. They actually ARE commedians and both can act so I won't dog them out.
Parents who insist on being thier child's "Friend": Being physically and mentally abusive to little Johnny may wreck his self esteem. I agree; however, treating Johnny like he's your younger brother rather than your son and never showing him that his actions have consequences will turn him into a disrespectfull little vinegar and water filled feminine hygeine product with an overwhelming sense of entitlement who as an adult will need a deep-down-home-countryboy-what-you say-about-my-mama-ASSWHIPPIN'. So be Johnny PARENT now. You can be his friend/mentor/big brother when he's in his 30's.
Celebrity "News": I like Angelina Jolie's movies, but I don't need to know that she took her son shopping for a new Playstation 12? or is adopting a small child from the Democratic Federated Socialist Republic of Yusukistan. Let celebs have a private life.
Ryan Seacrest: Sorry you did WHAT to earn a star on the Hollywood walk of fame? Stanley Kubrick directed iconic films...and HE doesn't have one. You're a radio DJ who hosts American Idol and says: "Seacrest Out" as you're leaving a room. Cha...not feelin' ya princess. I want to see a bunch of thugs beat the man down for sport and have one of them say 'Seacrest out.' before knockin' him the vugg out. What a tool.
Movies based on tv shows OR that are remakes of OTHER films: Are there so many idiots running Hollywood that no one has an original idea, or does Hollywood lack the cojones to make films and television shows that take any kind of risks? Hey Hollywood...grow a pair.
Tom Brady: Miss, when you have a 40 point lead in a football game after two quarters of play, if there are 60 seconds on the clock...in the second quarter you kneel on the ball and run down the clock. You don't shove the ball down your opponents throat and try to see if you can score another touchdown. That madame where I come from is what we'd call a bitch move. Wonder why you spent last season out with that leg injury? Because you've been playing like an arrogant little BITCH for most of your career.
Well there you have it. The first installment of the nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind and if ya don't like it...life's hard....deal with it.
Hand Sanitizer: For God's sake. I'm IN a bathroom. I want a big, soapy anti bacterial lather. This crap is just some gooey alcohol that kills germs...but leaves dirt in place. I had axel grease on my hands. The hand sanitizer killed every last germ in it! I can't touch ANYTHING....but if I did the huge black stains I left would be hypoallergenic!
BlueTooth Headsets: Ever see a guy walking down the street talking to himself? If you saw this before 2005 it was some mentally disturbed individual discussing the subtle differences between 18th century British Parlaimentary procedures and the current model used in India or Why Pitt the Elder was a MUCH better Prime Minister than Benjamin Deshrali. NOW if you see the same guy and he has a little piece of blue plastic on his ear...you can rest assured that some bozo OTHER than you is listening to this prattling dufus.
Fox News: I could care less that they used press releases from the Bush Whitehouse as news stories. It doesn't bother me that they trash President Obama. They make the hate list because of the whole "tea bag" fiasco. People, you're entitled to slant to the right. The world would suck if we all agreed, but you can't argue that you're fair and balanced and that you're merely reporting news if you SPONSORED the "tea parties" and set up "tea party" web sites. Ladies and gents despite how un-abashedly pro Obama MSNBC is...durring the presidential campaigns they didn't set up Obama web sites. For the record I don't hate YOU guys. It's the hypocricy I hate.
The BCIS Ratings: So I have to watch USC, UT and Notre Dame in Bowl games every season even if they post sucky records because by VIRTUE of the fact that they are USC, UT and Notre Dame...they're going to AUTOMATICALLY make it to bowl games? There are colleges and universities with winning teams who we'll never see playing in a bowl game, because YOU jackasses don't know of any famous alumni from the schools in question. You guys should change if from the BCIS to the BSCIS. It would be more fitting. Hey guys ever hear of PLAYOFFS? They do it for college basketball...no one's complained yet.
Kid's Breakfast Cereal: Not because they're loaded with sugar. Not because they have no nutritional value, not because they're possibly the worst things any human can possibly consume...but because they don't put PRIZES in the boxes anymore! WTF people. A brotha can't get a decoder ring in a box of Cocoa Pebbles? Captain Crunch out of 3D glasses? You people sicken me!
People who talk on the PHONE or Text while driving: Okay. We as a society live under the DELUSION that there is such a thing as "multi-tasking" Translation a bunch of cheap A-holes who run companies rather than letting individuals be productive by doing one thing at a time give one person the work of three people. This idiocy crept it's way into real life to the point where people will attempt to manuver a couple of thousand pounds of steel and fiberglass through groups of people doing the same while:
a. applying make up
b. eating
c. playing air guitar
d. text messaging
e. receiving "oral pleasure" (as outlined in the film "Pulp Fiction")
f. watching small video screens
g. reading books/ news papers
h. combing their hair
i. TALKING ON THE PHONE!
People try something novel...like...um...I don't know....DRIVING YOUR *FCUK(tm.)ing car!
*FCUK = French Connection United Kingdom a clothing manufacturer...I had no idea they made cars.
The Techno remix of ANYTHING!!!: I liked the song. I liked the first remix...do you have to do 20 remixes of a given song or worse still give it the same sickening euro-trash (in 2/4 time dum-dum-dum-dum-dum-dum...dum-dum-dum-dum-dum) back beat? Just shoot me in the forehead, it would be much more humane than hearing the mega-mix of Elmo singing the alphabet.
The Dallas Cowboys: They didn't do anything in particular this time around, but I've always hated the organization for various reason and I just didn't want to leave them out.
Basketball referees: The officials are the reason I don't watch basketball anymore. No one calls traveling EVER! "Marquis" players don't get called for ANYTHING. Michael Jordan was a gifted athlete...he didn't NEED referees ignoring the FLAGRANT fouls he committed...but they did anyway. If you doubt that refs can control the outcome of a basketball game...ask the Sacremento Kings how four of their starting FIVE fouled out in a playoff game against the Lakers.
Activist with 'mysterious' sources of income: Ever see someone on TV with the caption "community activist" under their name? I'll bet it's someone who has a camera in his/her face whenever there is an issue with some disenfranchised group. After the rally or press conference ends, this person usually hops into a new Mercedes or a Range Rover and drives off to a big house..rather than some kind of job. I'm all for helping out one's community...but if it seems like it's all you do you kinda look like a parasite. Martin Luther King was a minister, Caesar Chavez was a Union Organizer. My point? Both of these cats had jobs. Look into it...
The Hills/Keeping up With the Kadashians/Jon & Kate/ Kathy Griffin/ & Every"SCRIPTED reality show: I only know who Heidi and Spencer are...because TMZ puts a camera in their faces every 8 seconds and TELLS ME their famous, prior to that I neither knew, cared nor gave a vugg. Insofar as I can figure out she's an idiot and he's a douche incapable of growing visible facial hair. Kim Kardashian is pretty enough, but had she not video taped herself getting her freak on with Brandi's barely talented younger brother (who would have had neither a recording/acting career without her) would anyone have any clue who she was? You're a pretty Armenian girl with a big butt...so what. That and $5.00 will get you a coffee at Starbucks. If you don't have any actual talent you shouldn't be famous simply for BEING famous. The exceptions are Kathy Griffin and Maragret Cho. They actually ARE commedians and both can act so I won't dog them out.
Parents who insist on being thier child's "Friend": Being physically and mentally abusive to little Johnny may wreck his self esteem. I agree; however, treating Johnny like he's your younger brother rather than your son and never showing him that his actions have consequences will turn him into a disrespectfull little vinegar and water filled feminine hygeine product with an overwhelming sense of entitlement who as an adult will need a deep-down-home-countryboy-what-you say-about-my-mama-ASSWHIPPIN'. So be Johnny PARENT now. You can be his friend/mentor/big brother when he's in his 30's.
Celebrity "News": I like Angelina Jolie's movies, but I don't need to know that she took her son shopping for a new Playstation 12? or is adopting a small child from the Democratic Federated Socialist Republic of Yusukistan. Let celebs have a private life.
Ryan Seacrest: Sorry you did WHAT to earn a star on the Hollywood walk of fame? Stanley Kubrick directed iconic films...and HE doesn't have one. You're a radio DJ who hosts American Idol and says: "Seacrest Out" as you're leaving a room. Cha...not feelin' ya princess. I want to see a bunch of thugs beat the man down for sport and have one of them say 'Seacrest out.' before knockin' him the vugg out. What a tool.
Movies based on tv shows OR that are remakes of OTHER films: Are there so many idiots running Hollywood that no one has an original idea, or does Hollywood lack the cojones to make films and television shows that take any kind of risks? Hey Hollywood...grow a pair.
Tom Brady: Miss, when you have a 40 point lead in a football game after two quarters of play, if there are 60 seconds on the clock...in the second quarter you kneel on the ball and run down the clock. You don't shove the ball down your opponents throat and try to see if you can score another touchdown. That madame where I come from is what we'd call a bitch move. Wonder why you spent last season out with that leg injury? Because you've been playing like an arrogant little BITCH for most of your career.
Well there you have it. The first installment of the nonsensical ravings of a lunatic mind and if ya don't like it...life's hard....deal with it.
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